Stick Em Up!

Incontinence issues.

A fact of life for a woman of my age.

Today however, that statement rang very differently.

I was in the bank, at or with the cashier, whatever version you want to paint, when the cops showed up because there had been an alarm that the bank was being held up.

Again, let me take you back to where I was stationed, at the cashier...

I wished I had been wearing depends.

The cashier looked at me, and I at her in horror.

I had no plans to slip a note across the counter but to merely deposit a check and leave without anyone's money besides mine.

I instinctively just put my hands up.

Like, what do you do when this happens?!?

And ofcourse I am at the cashier stand so if someone were to rob the bank it would be me, theoretically right?!?

Sidenote the night before I remembered I had these iron on patches so my crafty ass found all the letters to put my last name on a denim shirt....talk about incognito...

I just said to her, you know this isn't me right?

She smiled, nervously.

Well after a few more cops showed up and clearly didn't see me as a threat, truth be told they never looked in my direction, it was my paranoia about the bizarre situation that had my mouth agape, that I left, without incident.

Uncharged and unharmed, with my last name postered on my back in case anyone wanted to hunt me down.

Consider it my new calling card...

Feeling better about my luck, I hopped over to the Dollar Tree.

My new happy place.

Upon getting out of the car, the belt I was wearing, one of my mom's old vintage belts, which is awesome by the way, fell down.

Sidenote, it was not attached to my pants, more of a statement piece, just like how almost every watch I own identifies as a bracelet because they don't work.

Anywho, I screamed like someone who got pansed in the parking lot.

My pants were very much still on.

My ego, however, was with that belt on the concrete.

That said, I went out and saw the world today!

Yay!

And this is how the world repaid me, with a brand new Cynthia story!

Watch out world, I took a break, but I think I am coming around a corner, and this next chapter could quite possibly be the best one yet.

Did I mention I landed a Sol De Janiero dupe in the process?

As long as my day didn't end in prison for robbing a bank and my pants not falling off?

Yep, I'll take that as a win.

Smelling my new scent as we speak, and it smells like freedom.

Xoxo,

C.