Groupon.

I have noticed I may have single handedly saved the economy with my online shopping during the pandemic.

One of my favorites, GROUPON.

Meal deals? Sure! That massage? I'll take it! Those cute little hoop earrings? Yes please! Make me a LADY, oh hell yea!

You can buy titles on Groupon. Like real actual titles.

I now hold the title of Lady, in County Kerry, Ireland.

The brochure that accompanied my new title stated that I am not only able to, but ENCOURAGED to use my new title upon making any kind of reservations. The booklet also promoted having my new title put on letterhead and business cards.

One user claimed using her new title scored her a free breakfast at the Inn she was staying.

According to this pamphlet I could even hand down my title to my offspring (but not to worry the price was so great, I got them all their own titles).

I am now Lady Cynthia of Kerry.

Please take note, I will be using this title on all official and unofficial business moving forward as well as any reservations.

Can't wait for my free breakfast!

Tah Tah peasants, getting new business cards printed out.

Xoxo,

Lady C.