Chicken Kiev.

My appetite hasn't been great as of late.

A few days back I found chicken kievs at the grocery store, I nearly lost my shit.

I haven't been able to find it in years.

My mom would make them as a treat.

I bought almost every box.

As my kids were trick or treating I figured I treat myself in an empty house.

I made rice and that delicacy of chicken.

Once it was ready I was so excited.

The minute I took it out of the oven it fell on the floor spilling out all of that flavored butter that makes chicken kiev so delicious.

That piece of chicken wasn't the only thing that fell on that floor, so did I.

I don't ask for much, but I lost it, screaming at the top of my lungs that I hated my life.

Why God?

Why?

I was supposed to meet up with one of my children but instead sobbed in my bed watching Netflix.

I finally composed myself and went downstairs for a second attempt.

Well God has a great sense of fucking humor, because while I didn't drop this one; whomever made it didn't include the butter or spices that spilled onto the kitchen floor like the one that was made prior, making me almost want to lick said floor.

I may be the first person in history to have had to add butter to chicken Kiev.

These days my cursing game is strong.

But what I reflected on today, was not that I hate my life, not even close.

I hate the circumstances that life deals us, and I hate how I have reacted to them recently, but also while noting that I am good enough to reflect that I am trying.

Things will go wrong, and we will perhaps get angry.

Scream, yell or have tantrums, but go for that second, third and fourth attempt.

We will deal with bad things from time to time, but we need to understand we are all on our own timeline of how to handle them and feel about them.

Some of our reactions may look better than others.

Speaking of which, another of like 30 times I have left my couch looking decent, today I saw one of the 5 people on planet earth who associates with me, and I was wearing cheetah slippers, zebra pajama pants and a Budweiser sweatshirt, with my hair looking like Doc Brown.

Like I said, never underestimate God, because that man has a sense of humor like no other.

Don't trust me?

Let's hang out.

Xoxo,

C.