Trauma Bond.

Sometimes when we have endured extreme stress at the hands of another, we develop a trauma bond.

A relationship of the most unhealthy form.

One, where, when we become abused, we start to associate, and relate to our captors.

Even have compassion for them .

Stockholm syndrome.

We start to bond with our kidnappers.

We begin to collaborate with them, and rationalize.

Make sense of their actions, and agree, that we deserve to be punished.

That our treatment was warranted.

Or that we need to be cared for in a certain way.

We begin to feel like we have had it coming.

But knowing deep down, something isn't right.

Not able to put our finger on why it is not right.

Yet, lacking the confidence to express ourselves.

But having that gut instinct.

And yet, wanting to make sense of what is happening, and then reluctantly, accepting.

To the point where we start to explain.

Justify.

Defend.

Become complicit in the abuse.

Reliant.

Projective.

Excusive.

Normalizing.

Without knowing.

Giving power to the abuser.

Without even realizing it.

Feeling we deserved it

The genuineness being, we never did.

The truth unfolding that, we are better than this.

And once we understand this, there is no turning back.

When we own this, we begin a journey on a progressive projectile.

Only running forward.

Towards a new beginning.

One that shows promise.

Hope.

True Love.

A future.

A second chance.

Maybe a third chance.

Or perhaps it is actually, truly, the first chance we never got.

Xoxo,

C.