Raising Royalty.

The first kid was more of a hail Mary.

I biologically wasn't supposed to have kids; without medical help that is.

But, well you see, I got pregnant a month after our marriage.

Legal on the books marriage, with a real adult wedding!

I wasn't 16 and knocked up!

When I told my parents?

They had a response akin to me being 14 and on MTV, if you know, you know.

If you want to share good news and be made to feel a failure, I have addresses you can write to.

When I shared the news with my grandmother, she replied, and I quote, "so barely decent."

No question mark for a reason.

If you need to, read that again.

Also no smiley face emoji.

Again, for a reason.

I sat down immediately.

It didn't quite seem like the excitement one would expect about a legal relationship between two nearly 30 year old people.

Nonetheless, going back to my point, when my first came along, the name was basic, simple, but deeply meaningful.

When it came the other two, my daydreams got the best of me.

They were to have royal names.

Long names.

Traditional names.

They would have TWO middle names.

The first child's name to have purpose.

The next child's name to have agreement between parents, and the third?

The Queen of England's approval.

When I had my last baby, my aunt called immediately and said," who do you think we are?! royalty? What is with this name?!"

Meanwhile that same last kid had a different name entirely for 3 days until we changed it because of the audible disdain in the response to them, aka, our family hearing us tell them the name of our new baby, Georgette, made us feel guilty.

I still regret that my little Georgie girl became my sweet E.

Not that she didnt smell as sweet ofcourse, but that I let the pressure get to me.

Anyways,

They are royal.

All 3 of my kiddos.

Royal pains in the butt.

Royal pains in the wallet.

Royal pains in my head.

Royal pains in my heart, always and forever.

Now you live up to those Royal expectations you royal trio.

I know you will.

Love you to the moon and back.

Xoxo,

C.

I love you forever and always.

Your Queen Mother.